"Seriously kid, can you please leave me alone. Did I say please? How bout NOW. I have had enough of your smacks, your kisses, your kicks, your grabs, and your evilness. I'm just trying to lay on the couch in peace. Didn't your mom teach you any manners? "
"Being smacked in the face once is tolerable, twice is annoying and three to fifty times just really starts to piss me off. Your lucky I don't smack back. In fact, I have thought about biting you, but I don't want to land my butt locked in my kennel for then next 2 years. But, really, I'm thinking it might be worth it...."
"Your smile may be cute...but I'm not finding it very cute right now. Especially when you just chucked 15 of your legos at me and flashed me a REALLY big smile. Nice try. Mom may fall for that...but I don't."
"If you really want me to play with you....go sneak me some treats from the cabinet. Then we can talk. "