1.19.2009

Surviving the TANTRUM!

What is it about Elmo?

Wait...who care's!

It works.

So, I'm not complaining.
This is my way of dealing with tantrums...but I have to admit...there has to be a better way than bribing your child with Elmo, right?
I did a little research on how to survive your toddlers tantrums (if its even possible) and here is what I found:
1. Don't punish the child.
me: HUH? Really? I failed that one.
2. Don't reward the child.
me: Shoot! Does this mean bribing him to watch Elmo is not the way to go?
3. Stay calm and ignore the behavior to the extent possible.
me: How do you ignore a screaming 18 month old who is running around your house like he has been possesed by the devil?
4. Keep the child safe.
me: Making the "naughty corner" a seat on the fireplace...not a good idea. I learned this FAST. In midst of the tantrum, he threw his head back and hit it on the fireplace.
5. Isolate the child if possible.
me: Not sure about you, but the only place for me to isolate my lil guy is his crib. But, then I am worried that if I make the crib the "naught place"...he'll never want to go to bed again!
6. Don't let the disapproval of other people affect your response to the tantrum.
me: I am not even repsonding to this one. (I live for the approval of my peers!)

Then it went on to say:
"When your child throws a tantrum, he is essentially out of control."
me: After I read that sentence I literally, out loud, said "No Sh**" (which is not something you want to do if your toddler is repeating everything you say right now). But, seriously, come on Captain Obvious, we know our child is "essentially out of control"....now we need to know what to do to get our child "essentially in control" PLEASE!
"You must make sure that you stay firmly in control. Punishing the toddler for throwing a tantrum, by yelling or spanking, makes the tantrum worse in the short term and prolongs the behavior in the long term.
me: I've been witness to this one! Is this possibly why it took my son 35 minutes to come back to Earth?
"Trying to stop the tantrum by giving in to the child's demands is even worse. This is the way to teach a child to use tantrums for manipulation, and will cause the behavior to continue indefinitely, even into adulthood."
me: Now this makes me feel EXTREMELY responsible for how my son will act for the rest of his life. I am listening now.
Overall, what I got out of this article, was that when your toddler throws a tantrum...do nothing. Ignore him. Go about your business cleaning dishes or doing laundry (or blogging), and DO NOT even make eye contact with him. Eventually, your toddler will learn that this kind of behavior is getting him no where!
This sounds good to me....except when I am in public and need him to STOP immediately! Then what?

4 comments:

Jenny said...

So when I looked at this pic the first thing I noticed was your TV stand. Which took me back to the pics of your house...are you going to be selling any of your furniture when you move into your new house? I'm looking for things that are a lot like what you have but trying to go about it the cheapER way!

AmyT said...

ummm what is wrong with a little bribing I say?? I do it ALL the time - too bad santa only comes once a year!!!! (BTW I have santa's phone number....yes that works and yes I used that) we all find what works - you gotta do what ya gotta do!!!!

Kerri said...

I CAN so relate with you! My son is about to turn two...I use jelly beans instead of Elmo...Whatever works I think! Ohhh, is my child not the only one possessed by demons when he throws a fit!

The Parrish Family said...

I can't wait! I have soooo much to look forward to!